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The One with Monicas tampons

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A new Ross and Rach fan

Joined: 31 May 2004
Posts: 5
Location: Norway

Post The One with Monicas tampons
Mon May 31, 2004 5:57 pm
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This fanfic was written in dec. last year. Please tell me what you think of it Smile

The One with Monicas tampons

written by Koya


(Sunday morning at Chandler and Monica’s apartment, Chandler is sitting at the kitchen table eating a huge breakfast and Monica is in the bathroom with the door half open)

Monica: (in a humiliated begging voice) Sweetie?

Chandler: Yeah!

Monica: Can you come in here?

Chandler: Do I have to?

Monica: Yes you do!!

(Cut to bathroom, Monica’s sittng on the toilet wearing her bathrobe and a towel-turban over her hair as Chandler enters)

Chandler: Yes???

Monica: Okay this is really embassasing but I have sort of an emergency situation here.. I…I…. I ran out of…….

(Cut to front door, Rachel enters wearing fannell pants and a tank top and an overall just got out of bed look)

Rachel: (shouting) Mon?

Chandler: We’re in the bathroom

Monica: (quietly to herself) Oh thank God! (shouting:) Rach, can you please come in here? (To Chandler)… You can leave now.

Chandler: Sure you don’t want me here?

Monica: Ohhh yes I’m quite sure!

(Opening credits)

(Chandler leaves as Rachel enters the bathroom)

Rachel: Mon, you look like you’re in pain, what’s wrong? (sits down at the bathtub edge)

Monica: It’s no big deal it’s just that I don’t have any…… (takes a deep breath and looks really embarrased) I got my period this morning, really bad and I don’t have any tampons or maxipads left- and I was about to ask Chandler but then you came.

Rachel: Want me to go out get you some, cause I am all out too. Joey found them and you know Joey?

Monica: What did he do?

Rachel: He dipped them in Cranberry juice and hung them up in front of the bathroom mirror.

Monica: That’s disgusting!

Rachel: Yeah well… you know I am so used to living with him now that I actually taught it was funny. So just give me an hour and I will go to the store for you., okay?

Monica: An hour? And what am I going to do, I can’t just sit here.

Rachel: I can get you a magazine or a book?

Monica: Rachel!!!

Rachel: I can’t go to the store looking like this. The guy behind the counter is soooo cute and I always get embarrased when I have to buy stuff like that.

Monica: You go down there right now, just run a comb over you hair and put on a jacket and shoes. My purse is on my nightstand….

Rachel: But…..

Monica: (angry) GO!

Rachel: Okay Okay (runs out of the bathroom)

(Cut to apartment overview with Chandler still eating breakfast and Rachel running from the bathroom and into the bedroom, Joey enters)

Joey: Hey man.

Chandler: Hey- want some breakfast?

Joey: How can you even ask me that?

(Joey sits down and starts buttering his roll when Rachel comes marching out of the bedroom with Monica’s purse, quite irritated with quick steps)

Joey: Mornin……

Rachel: (in an angry voice) Oh easy for you to say!

(Rachel slams the door leaving Chandler and Joey looking like two question marks)

Chandler: That time of the month huh?

Joey: What time?

(Phoebe enters carrying a Big Brown Bag)

Phoebe: Hey you guys…. where is Monica?

(Chandler points to the bathroom)

Monica: (still in the bathroom) I’m in here!

Phoebe: Oh…. are you dressed?

Monica: Yes I am, you can come in.

(Phoebe walks towards the bathroom, cut to Chandler and Joey)

Joey: What is it with women beeing together in the bathroom?

Chandler: (looking confused) Why would I know that?

(cut to bathroom, Phoebe sits on the bathtub edge and Monica is still on the toilet)

Phoebe: So what’s going on?

Monica: Well, I ran out of tampons and Rachel is out getting some forr me… hey, I’ve said that so many times now that I’m not even embarrased anymore.

Phoebe: I don’t think Rachel is out getting them?

Monica: What??

Phoebe: No I just stopped by her apartment to drop off some books I borrowed and I heard that someone was in the shower.

Monica: Are you sure it wasn’t Joey?

Phoebe: Well if it was he has an identical twin- cause he is sitting at your kitchen table eating pancakes with Chandler.

Monica: I cannot believe this, it takes Rachel forever to get ready in the morning. I’ll be stuck here until noon. she promised she would go right away.

Phoebe: I’ll go for you?

Monica: You would, like right now, oh you are the best. My purse is probably over at Rachels.

Phoebe: Okay, I’ll go!!!

(cut to livingroom/kitchen Phoebe comes walking out of the bathroom and walks towards the door…..)

Joey: Won’t you have breakfast with us?

Phoebe: I’ll be back soon, just have to do some stuff for Monica.

(Phoebe leaves and closes the door)

Joey: I wonder what Monica’s doing in there, do you wanna sneak in and take a look?

Chandler: (glares at him) Monica is my wife!

Joey: So??

(Chandles rises from the table and starts walking towards the bathroom, Joey get’s up and starts to follow when Chandler turns around and glares at him one more time)

Chandler: Do you mind?

Joey: (looks disappointed) I’ll never get to do anything (sits down again and takes another pancake).

(cut to bathroom, Chandler enters)

Monica: (embarrased) What are you doing here?

Chandler: I would like to shave?

Monica: Now?

Chandler: Yes now….. Monica what’s wrong, why are you still here?

Monica: I am waiting for Phoebe!

Chandler: And why did both Rachel and Phoebe leave after they where in here?

Monica: Okay Okay, I am out of tampons, - I have my period and I need tampons cause I don’t have any, (out loud) NO TAMPONS!

Chandler: And why didn’t you just tell me that when I was in here?

Monica: Cause I was embarrased. I didn’t want you to think I was grose. I don’t know I just…. just couldn’t tell you okay. I’m sorry.

Chandler: Monica, (kneels down in fron of her) I am your husband, we live together and I want to do stuff like this. I don’t think your grose…. not at all. I love you!

Monica: Awwww, why do you always have to be so sweet.

Chandler: (smiles) Cuz that’s just the wonder that is me.

(Chandler gives Monica a kiss on her cheek and leaves)

(Commercial break)

(cut to front door), Phoebe enters with a small bag completely stacked with Tampax boxes and Always maxipads)

Joey: Heyyyy what do you have there, is it candy?

Phoebe: Uhhhh no, no candy.

Joey: (shocked) It’s sunday, how can you go to the store and not buy me any candy?

(Phoebe sighs and puts the bag on the table and accidentely swings it down when she takes off her coat….. tampons and pads flying everywhere)

Phoebe: Oh no!

Joey: Heyyy, this is more fun than candy

(Phoebe begins to pick up the boxes from the floor and pushes Joey away)

Phoebe: Joey! This is for Monica…..

Joey: (shocked) Oh is that why she been in there ohhhh, (Joey drops the boxes in his hands and goes to the chouch, grabbs a book and looks embarrased).

Phoebe: I’ll just give this to Mon (walks towards the bathroom)

(cut back to the front door, Rachel walks in looking fresh and clean carrying a paper bag same as the one Phoebe came with)

Rachel: Hi guys!

Joey: Heyyy (stands up starts to walk towards Rachel but sees the paper bag, quickly turns around and sits down again on the chouch and glares into the book.

Rachel: I’ll just.. deliver these (walks towards the bathroom and meets Phoebe halfway. Phoebe sees the bag Rachel is carrying and says in a sort of thiumphy way)

Phoebe: Ha! Too late.

(Rachel is right in front of the bathroom door when Monica comes out and looks at her in a very evil way)

Rachel: I’m.. I’m sorry okay I was just going to have a quick shower and I…

Monica: A quick shower? You have no idea what a quick shower is!

(Monica quickly walks towards her bedroom, enters and slams the door, Rachel sits down on the chouch with Chandler, Joey and Phoebe, Rachel is very upset)

Rachel: (sobbing) I can’t belive she got mad at me,

Phoebe: Well, you said you where going to the store right away but you didn’t.

Rachel: I was just having a shower….

Phoebe: But you left Monica in the bathroom…

Chandler: I think you ow her an apology.

Rachel: But… yeah okay I know.

(Ross enters)

Ross: Hi!

Phoebe, Rachel, Joey and Chandler: Hi.

Ross: So, what’s going on.

All: Nothing!

Ross: (suspicious) Okay… um, where’s Mon?

Phoebe: In her room, but you can’t go in there.

Ross: Why not?

Phoebe: Do you like to watch your sister get dressed?

Ross: (shocked) No! God NO!

Phoebe: Then you can just sit here and talk to us can’t you?

Ross: (sighs) Yeah, I guess.

(Monica comes out of the bedroom, fully dressed and walks towards the kitchen, Rachel gets up and follows her)

(cut to kitchen, Monica’s making coffee)

Rachel: Mon, I’m sorry okay, I was selfish. I should have walked to the store right away.

Monica: You don’t have to be sorry, it’s just the way you are.

Rachel: What? Monica how can you say that?

Monica: If you needed help I would never have left you like that. I was in there for almost an hour.

Rachel: I said I was sorry.

Monica: (ignoring Rachel’s apology)You guys ate all the pancakes?

(She grabs a Snapple from the fridge and walks back to her bedroom and closes the door)

Chandler: Now I feel bad too.

Phoebe: Me too, you guys are totally bringing me down.

Ross: What’s wrong with Monica?

Phoebe: It’s a bloody story, you really don’t wanna know about it.

(commercial break)

(Monica’s bedroom, Rachel enters with a breakfast tray lit with a candle)

Rachel: Mon, I am so sorry for the way I acted but look, I made you breakfast (put’s the tray in front of her).

Monica: You made pancakaes? You never cook.

Rachel: I did for you.

Monica: You are totally forgiven.

(they hug)

Closing credits


(Monica and Chandlers apartment, Monica is looking in the fridge)

Monica: Chandler, did you drink all the Cranberry juice, I had two whole cartons in here yesterday?

Chandler: No!

Monica: But then who……… (turns around and walks towards the front door…….) JOEY!

the end
I am a norwegian- thats does not make me wierd Smile
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Knows every episode by heart

Joined: 12 Nov 2003
Posts: 486
Location: Warner Bros. Lot, stage 24, a.k.a. the Friends Stage

Mon May 31, 2004 7:35 pm
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that was funny! i like this part
Chandler: That time of the month huh?

Joey: What time?

lol! and the cranberry juice is funny too =)

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Regina Filange

Joined: 12 Jul 2003
Posts: 2459
Location: 945 Grove street apt. 20

Tue Jun 01, 2004 2:57 am
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hahaha, that was so funny! He dipped the tampons in cranberry juice, LMAO! very good!

Ross and Rachel 4ever :heart:

Jennifer Aniston's other #1 fan
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A new Ross and Rach fan

Joined: 31 May 2004
Posts: 5
Location: Norway

Post Re: The One with Monicas tampons
Wed Jun 02, 2004 6:10 pm
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So glad you guys liked it.

I am a norwegian- thats does not make me wierd Smile
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Saw every Friends episode

Joined: 12 Apr 2004
Posts: 325
Location: Ireland UK

Thu Jun 03, 2004 8:41 pm
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Yeah was funny make more Razz
Jennifer Aniston No 1 IRISH Fan!!

Ross + Rachel Foreva!

Tow the videotape:

Rachel: Clearly you don’t want people to see this tape. Now I don’t want people to see this tape either, but you so badly don’t people to see it, it makes me want to see it. You see?

Joey: (confused) Are we watchin’ the tape or not?!
(Fav ep!)
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A new Ross and Rach fan

Joined: 24 Dec 2004
Posts: 25

Mon Dec 27, 2004 3:58 pm
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hahahahaha!!!i...haha...cant breath!!hahahahahaha!!!!
Rachel:Hello officer.Was I goin' a little too fast?
Ross:oh,dear lord.
Officer:licence please.
Rach:(to officer) oh,yeah, know,I had a dream I got stopped by an officer,and then he...well,you dont wanna hear the rest.
Ross:(to rach) He gave you a big...fat...ticket?

Fav episode!TOW chandler's dad.
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